Indra Meulemans
July 17, 2024
•
3
minute read
ADHD stands for 'Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder'. A common stereotype associated with it is the image of a hyperactive boy in class who can't sit still. Although this type of ADHD is quickly noticed, the disorder often manifests itself in very different ways.
I'm not physically hyperactive. For me, it's less noticeable and more mental. In my junior year of high school, I started having trouble studying. In my senior year, I raised the alarm myself. I think I have a unique talent for procrastination. I'm really good at it. Throughout high school, I always procrastinated studying until the last minute. Learning Latin vocabulary? I did that as I walked into class. A whole weekend to study for a math exam? I started on Sunday evening and then, of course, panicked. I've gotten a bit better at managing it now, but back then, it was a disaster.
"I think I have a unique talent for procrastination."
In my senior year, I had a lot of trouble writing my final paper. Not long before that, a family member had been diagnosed with ADHD. When I heard the symptoms of ADHD, I told my mom I wanted to get tested for it too. ADHD has a genetic aspect, so there was a chance I had it too.
"ADHD has a genetic aspect."
By the end of my senior year, I was diagnosed with ADHD and prescribed medication. I was also advised to pursue behavior therapy, but I didn't do that at the time. Having a diagnosis was a huge relief. I was mostly afraid that I wouldn't have ADHD. Imagine if they said there was nothing wrong with me? Then I would have been super dramatic and gotten tested for nothing. That thought was terrible. It was terrifying. What was I supposed to do then?
I paid close attention to this last month. All external factors remained about the same: I was always in my dorm, surrounded by the same people, I always had to do the same things, I ate at the same times... So it couldn't be that.
I noticed a day and night difference in how I felt. The only difference was the phase of my cycle. I was super tired. It was hard to study and maintain structure. I'm already not good at structure and doing things necessary for living (like shopping, eating, showering, etc.). Before my period, it's like none of that matters. Then I lose structure and everything I've built up. That contributes to a feeling of "everything is going badly." It becomes a bit of a vicious cycle.
What I also noticed is that the days after my period... I feel like a functioning person. I am really a functioning person! Wow! So it's not that my ADHD gets much worse at the end of my cycle, but especially that it gets much better in the first half of my cycle! ADHD is basically your 'default status,' a permanent state of being, I feel. And when it gets better, I think, "Wow, I can do this!" I was a bit overwhelmed when I took my ADHD medication, because it didn't have the effect I normally get. I felt like I was more lost in my head than in my books while studying... I'm not sure why that is. If anyone has ever done research on ADHD medication and the menstrual cycle, let me know! It's very annoying.
ADHD often manifests differently in girls. The video below explains this very well.
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